– So, that is it? Are you leaving?

     – Yes. Now I am definitely leaving.

     – So what? Do you think it will be better there?

     – It will be hard. But it is better than here.

     – What do not you like here? For example, for me everything is fine.

     – You know, every day there are some small details, which in themselves do not solve anything. Nevertheless, year after year, they accumulated and now they have filled my cup of patience.

     For example, the son of an oligarch on his SUV crushed innocent people. People are outraged, passions are boiling. So what? He is now free and even continues to ride his expensive cars. Alternatively, for example, an official stole hundreds of millions of tenge from the budget, and he was given two years, and an ordinary man stole some small thing, and he was imprisoned for seven years. The country does not have enough money, and they carry out grandiose global events. The people are against renting land to foreigners, and they still pass laws. And how officials ride around in state-owned cars for restaurants and shops, take their children to school, it’s already considered sill y even to raise the issue. As if this is normal.

     I am greatly oppressed by the fact that nothing depends on citizens here. We do not really choose a parliament, a government or a president. Everything is done by our rulers without us. Because there is no democracy, corruption is rampant. Any of us is helpless and defenseless before any official. Recently I read what is happening in the police of two regional centers. Just imagine, you did not like the boss of the police and you are thrown a sawn-off into the house, and then put in jail. Moreover, in court you cannot prove anything, because the law enforcers and courts are tied up. Surely, the same is happening in other areas. So, it can happen to absolutely any of us.

     How can you happily live in a country where you are helpless and unarmed in front of a large unjust state machine?

     – Well, fight it. It is your country. Who, if not you, will do it?

     – I am fighting as much as I can. I am performing, writing. I do not feel safe because of this. You saw what happened to the two bloggers just because they reprinted the text from someone else’s book.

     – And I honestly thought that you are running out due to economic difficulties. Earlier, at a high rate of our currency, all was well. When the currency was went down, the incomes fell, so all at once ran in different directions, like rats from a ship.

     – You know, on the contrary, I was against the artificial course from the very beginning. It would be better not to restrain him, but immediately let him go. Then, there would not be a sharp devaluation.

     Furthermore, I am not afraid to live in a poor country. We lived in the 90’s worse. But, at that time we had hope. We believed that, having gained independence, we would all go through difficulties together and become stronger and richer. So it all began. Then something went wrong. Personally, I associate all the problems with the rollback of democracy. Any president, any government is mistaken, even the most intelligent in the most developed country. But if there is no democracy, and the people cannot re-elect their rulers, then they begin to feel infallible, always right. They concentrate power in their hands and do not give it to anyone. And if the government is in the same hands, then the entire huge state apparatus no longer needs to be liked by the people. It is necessary to please the superior. Thus, the state does not become an instrument of the people, but an instrument for keeping the people in obedience to the ruler. Officials are not servants, but masters of citizens. In such an environment, corruption is flourishing. After all, with one official from the vertical hierarchy, you can always agree, unlike the people elected managers. Our officials are not afraid of the people, but of their boss. That is how the country comes to a standstill. No economy will save. You can even give out all state money to people for free, but if they do not feel confident, if they are not sure in their own security and the justice, what is the point of money? All the same, you will be taken away from them.

     – And you do not feel like a traitor who left his homeland?

     – I have been thinking about this for a long time. But I weighed everything and decided that living and healthy in liberty, even abroad, I would bring my country and my family more benefits than helpless and behind bars.

     – How will you benefit your country from abroad?

     – And how do the famous conductor Alan Buribayev, the popular boxer Gennady Golovkin, the former cyclist Smirnov, benefit to our country? How did the singer Batyrkhan Shukenov bring benefit to our country? All these people live or lived abroad. Are not they ceased to be ours?

     – You should not compare yourself to celebrities.

     – Of course, I am not a celebrity, but I, in my own way, will also benefit Kazakhstan. In the way that I do best. I am a former journalist. I will write. In social networks, on the Internet, in newspapers. I hope that the people of Kazakhstan will read me. I hope that my words will change something in their heads. This is the best I can do for the country. If I can do this here and abroad, then I would better do it abroad because there I will be in safe. There I will not be arrested for critical materials.

     – A very convenient position to justify your cowardice and escape from problems to a prosperous foreign land.

     – Remember this conversation. And remind me of it in the case when I start forgetting my homeland. As soon as I plunge into someone else’s well-being, get used to a calm, measured life and forget about the problems of my native country, then you can spit in my face and say that I am a traitor.

     But as long as I do not experience injustice in our land, expose the thievish officials, fight for fair decisions, shame our ill-mannered compatriots, give them examples of a developed culture and consciousness, my heart hurts for Kazakhstan, and my soul is here.

     Until then, I will consider myself as a true patriot.

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